Does everything have to change after divorce?

Divorce is undoubtedly a significant life event. As such, it typically results in a lot of change. People move, they have different financial resources and their lifestyle can change considerably.

Some change can be a good thing, especially when it is a change from an unhappy or unfulfilling marriage. However, too much change can prove to be overwhelming. If you find this to be the case, understand that not everything has to change after a divorce. There are some things that can stay the same.

Your children’s routine

If you share custody of your child with your ex, there could be a lot of changes to your relationship and daily interactions with your child. However, parents can help themselves and their children through a divorce by prioritizing consistency in a parenting plan.

This can include creating schedules so as to not disrupt a child’s routine, maintaining the same boundaries and committing to the same disciplinary approaches that you utilized during the marriage.

Your name

Many people — particularly women — consider changing their name after divorce. However, there is no requirement for anyone to change names when a marriage ends. If you want to keep the same last name that your kids have, or if it would cause too much confusion professionally to change your name, don’t feel pressured to do so.

Your network

After a divorce, it’s not just spouses that cut ties; in-laws and mutual friends can also be out of the picture. However, your family is still your family. And friends you had long before a marriage can still be an important part of your life after divorce. Even your colleagues can provide a sense of stability and normalcy after divorce. Recognizing these relationships that you still have can serve as a helpful anchor.

Reinvention and transition can be a big part of life after divorce. However, finding some normalcy can be reassuring.

Further, understand that even if few things stay the same after divorce, know that you will adjust to a new normal. To make this adjustment a little easier, you can pursue solutions in your divorce that protect your long-term needs and well-being.