The care and well-being of the children should be the priority in any divorce. Even under the best of circumstances, however, parents face a process that takes months and involves countless decisions with far-ranging impact. There is also the stress of not knowing what comes next.
Parents typically throw themselves into the task of helping the children adjust to a new life that involves two homes, drop-offs and a more formal schedule. However, it is also essential to spend some time on themselves.
Helpful tips for moving forward
Everyone has theories about who recovers faster, with men often remarrying first. Regardless, here are a variety of suggestions for women by women to start their process:
- Recognize that things are different: It can be hard to accept that the marriage is over, but acceptance is an important step to moving on.
- Avoid a rebound: It may be comfortable to become involved with another partner quickly, but time alone enables a divorcee to get a clearer picture of what they want and where they want to go.
- Get help: Support comes in many forms, including friends, family or a minister, but a professional therapist can provide a helpful and non-judgmental ear.
- Find healthy outlets: It is tempting to sit on the couch eating junk food with the drapes drawn, but a good exercise routine, taking a class or rekindling a love of an old hobby is good for the soul.
- Do not overshare: Do not share the gory details with friends or family (especially children), but giving those willing to listen to a general rundown is fine.
- Focus on being a better mom: Working moms and stay-at-home ones alike can do a reboot after the divorce by seeking out fun activities, exuding a positive attitude and reengaging with the kids in a new way.
Moms know best
Everyone will have their approach to self-care, and not all of the above tips may be helpful. If something is not working, try something else. The key is to find what works.